Anger during the teenage years is not completely unlike anger during the toddler years. There are a vast amount of changes going on in their body and their lives, of which they might not always fully understand or feel control over. Hormones are raging while they are not yet an adult but still a child. Anger is often a symptom of something else and to help our teens, we have to get to the root of the anger.
1. Why could my teen be so angry?
Anger could be the result of:
- Lack of control
- Sadness
- Hurt
- Fear
- Shame
- Stress
- Low self-esteem
- Death of a loved one
- Grief
- Abuse
- Divorce
- Bullying
- Adoption issues
- Peer pressure
2. When should we seek out help?
Seek help if you see the following warning signs:
- Self-harm
- Verbal threats
- Cruel behavior
- Irrational thinking
- Excessive arguments
- Destruction of property
- Excessive yelling or screaming
- Criminal activity
3. How can I help?
- Create clear boundaries
- Express your love for them
- Let them know what you expect from them
- Create clear repercussions for negative actions
- Try to get to the root of what is really bothering them
- Do not judge or correct them when they are explaining themselves
- Be an example of good behavior
- Limit technology use
- Encourage time outdoors
- Encourage healthy hobbies
- Spend quality time with them
- Empathize with them
We’ve all been teenagers at one point, so it can be easy for us to chock their feelings up to their hormones and ask them to suck it up. But if we really remember when we were teenagers, we can remember how big and important everything felt. How devastating it could be to be left out of situations, rejected by friends, or not live up to parental expectations. Empathize with your teen and be there for them.
If you still find yourself needing help, reach out to a licensed therapist and start giving them the tools they need to cope with their anger and find joy.
We are all in this together. Learn how we can help.