The start of every new relationship is all butterflies and sunbeams. Like every other start, it’s full of promise and excitement. This is where people tend to get lost and ignore potential warning signs. That other person seems to be everything we dreamed of. Besides, what is the point of entering into a relationship if you’re going to start finding faults with it straight away?
That might be true but we could prevent a lot of heartbreak for ourselves and the other person involved if we could only critically assess the situation from the start. Being honest with yourself doesn’t mean that a relationship won’t work out. It’s usually the only reason why it works out in the first place. But if we ignore the warning signs, we’re not doing anyone any favors. There are several red flags that will point to the fact that the relationship isn’t going to work out. We will skip the most obvious one, physical abuse. Physical abuse should never be tolerated, under any circumstances. If you’re experiencing it get immediate help and tell someone! Other warnings signs take time to notice. And when they do appear, we shouldn’t ignore them. After all, you deserve to be happy and not trapped in a dependent or an unfulfilling relationship.
Self-Destructive
The way in which someone treats or mistreats themself is reflective of the way they will treat you. If your partner is self-destructive, how can they strengthen you? If they are completely careless with their home, job, belongings, health, finances, or appearance, chances are they won’t be able to lend you the care you need and deserve. Look for someone who handles himself responsibly, lovingly, and gently so that they can treat you in this same manner.
Not Ready to Commit
Lasting relationships are the deeply fulfilling bonds we crave, but not all of us are able to uphold them. You should be with a partner who not only wants to fortify a relationship with you through time, but who understands the hard work needed to do so. Consider your partner’s dating history: has he or she been able to maintain at least one serious relationship? It will be difficult for your partner to keep up long-term love if he’s used to jumping from romance to romance. A partner who both expresses the desire for commitment and reinforces words with actions is a real treasure.
Your Partner Issues
There is no perfect partner because we all carry a bit of baggage. That’s normal. What’s not normal is a person who hauls entire loads of baggage from their past into your present life. Your partner may have children from a previous relationship, but their children shouldn’t make your life miserable. Your partner may have trust issues from past experiences, but their trust issues shouldn’t force you to continually prove yourself. If a relationship starts off this burdensome, it will only require more effort with time. Release it from your life and find a love that’s lighthearted, pure, and joyful.
No Compromises
The couple that can’t compromise can’t survive. A person’s inability to compromise quickly becomes evident. Your partner should be offering compromise freely at this point, and you should be taking turns giving in to each other. The fact that they don’t means the relationship will entail much sacrifice on your part.
Lying
People know how to lie, but your intuition doesn’t. The first one to tell you something is wrong will be your inner voice. Pay close attention to gut feelings that ask you to analyze your partner’s intentions, words, and actions more closely. Refrain from making excuses for this person just because you have strong feelings. Be honest with yourself and acknowledge when your partner isn’t acting in good faith or isn’t making you happy. Take divine signs seriously: it’s not an accident if you come across something that proves this person lied or isn’t who they say they are.
Mood Swings
Steer clear of the person who veers to moody extremes because this will ruin your emotional stability. Your partner shouldn’t leave you exhausted by the end of the day! You become what you’re around. And if you’re exposed to anger, bitterness, or resentment, you might find yourself becoming a person you don’t want to be. Riding such an emotional roller coaster will take a mental and physical toll on you. If your partner shifts from delighted to depressed in seconds, understand that a psychological imbalance exists. And if he or she gets angry over everything, know that this anger may spill onto you one day, too.
Not Generous
Generosity takes many forms. The most obvious form is a monetary one. But a person must also be giving with their time, affection, advice, and good intentions. Stinginess, greediness, and egoism are serious red flags. While you shouldn’t expect to receive the world on a silver platter, you should expect your partner to offer help when you’re in genuine need. Remember, the person who wants to share their world with you is preparing for a future with you. Be grateful for the partner who is giving in all senses of the word.
Treats Others Poorly
Be careful becoming too attached to the person who talks down to others, is rude without reason, or has negative relationships with family members. People who have problems with themselves often release them upon others. These problems can’t be resolved until they look within and eliminate the real cause. Your partner may treat you nicely in the beginning, but the same issues they have with other people in their life will creep into your own relationship down the line.
Your Partner isn’t Considerate
It’s demoralizing when your partner doesn’t check up on you or simply say hello. One of the most frequent complaints is that the new partner doesn’t initiate conversation; they have to be the ones to send the first message, or there’s no telling when the person will actually call. Even worse is when they show a pattern of disappearing, then reappearing like nothing happened. Beware of settling with a partner who’s emotionally ignorant or distant. You will find yourself telling this person the same thing over and over again, and it’ll go in one ear and out the other. One of the greatest qualities you can find in a partner is someone who is so emotionally intimate and considerate of you.
Unending Infidelity
If you discover your new partner being disloyal early on, spare yourself the heartbreak and move along. Chances are that they were prone to dishonesty long before you and will continue to be this way throughout the relationship with you. Often we hope we can change people or mold their character. We hope they will somehow be “different” with us than they’ve been in their past relationships. Then we experience deep disappointment when we realize that we can’t change anybody. They must change themself.
Wondering if your relationship can last?